Restrooms and corporate management!!! - bullshit
Restroom!!! - a place where geniuses put their minds to test! a place where a human being experiences both tantrum and peace at the same time! a place where philosophy blooms outta shitty thought occurrences! a placid atmosphere, yet results in tumultuous thoughts and expressions! - This is the place where a human being is devoid of desires except for his single and motivated outcome desire! This is the place where a person's thought flow is damn coherent and undisturbed from the chaotic world waiting outside! :)
The following management theories were a result of the aforesaid effect. Today's corporate management and scenarios can very well relate to the toilet from various angles of a corporate hierarchy ranging from employees to economical supremacy in an arena. ok! bullshit... read on!
1. No matter wherever you go, you still need to shit!
- While you cling on to the "career" mode and keep looking for opportunities in the so called biggies or corporations, you still need to go through the same shit of senior management! Every corporation might put up a vibrant 'McDonald's workplace with a smile!' tag, but eventually after eating one burger, you would definitely require a restroom within half an hour.
2. Immaterial of all your tantrums and efforts, what you produce inside a restroom is still Shit!
- Immaterial of whatever be your struggle, ultimately the work done in your office will be considered shit! So why waste time with all the tantrums?! The only struggle that can be seen in our faces is the one for freedom!
3. The longer you stay, the smellier the room becomes!
- The longer you stay in an organization, you get to know of all the shitty things happening in that place and yes! you'll become accustomed to the stench until a piece of the senior management's shit falls on your head! Now it becomes really smelly and all you wanna do is get out of the restroom! err... quit :)
4. Remember! there's always somebody waiting outside to do the shit!
- You'll definitely come across smart asses in your 'work'place who is ready to shit and is just waiting for you to get out. He might even bang the door, pull the trigger, flush your accounts. So be on guard and no matter what happens, do your shit! or work. The best thing is, the one waiting outside is always inquisitive about your shit!
5. You might enjoy the calmness, the peace and aura surrounding it, and yet remember! you can't live in a restroom.
- HR policies of today's organizations make sure they throw a hell a load of sand into our eyes. They make the best offices with the latest architectural designs and entertainment features. A toilet built in the form of a Colosseum is still a large restroom!
6. Overeating will result in constipation and you'll suffer from a heavy load!
- Never show that you can do more work than what is required. It is funny but yes, people will take it for granted and you'll be loaded with work all the time. Never ever do it! You'll never be freed from shit! err.. work!
7. When you're in Rome, do as the Romans do! - Use toilet paper.
- It might be stinky, sticky, but since you decided to be in Rome, you need to go by their protocols. If you keep searching for newer ways to work, the last thing you'll get is a bouquet decorated with the best of the flowers and a small note appreciating all the efforts that went in vain!
8. One who is in the restroom for long goes unnoticed, but one who leaves within seconds is always noticed!
- It is but funny to describe this situation. A person who leaves late from office always goes unnoticed, while a person who leaves early immaterial of whether he completes his work or not is noticed as an efficient and a smart worker. So leave early!
9. One who farts while doing the 'thing' will definitely get noticed.
- A person who makes a lot of noise while working is definitely noticed. Except for a few of us who think of courtesy as a duty, everybody else is definitely noticed!
and finally,
10. Early to the restroom and early to finish makes one wealthy, wise and diplomatic! :)
The following management theories were a result of the aforesaid effect. Today's corporate management and scenarios can very well relate to the toilet from various angles of a corporate hierarchy ranging from employees to economical supremacy in an arena. ok! bullshit... read on!
1. No matter wherever you go, you still need to shit!
- While you cling on to the "career" mode and keep looking for opportunities in the so called biggies or corporations, you still need to go through the same shit of senior management! Every corporation might put up a vibrant 'McDonald's workplace with a smile!' tag, but eventually after eating one burger, you would definitely require a restroom within half an hour.
2. Immaterial of all your tantrums and efforts, what you produce inside a restroom is still Shit!
- Immaterial of whatever be your struggle, ultimately the work done in your office will be considered shit! So why waste time with all the tantrums?! The only struggle that can be seen in our faces is the one for freedom!
3. The longer you stay, the smellier the room becomes!
- The longer you stay in an organization, you get to know of all the shitty things happening in that place and yes! you'll become accustomed to the stench until a piece of the senior management's shit falls on your head! Now it becomes really smelly and all you wanna do is get out of the restroom! err... quit :)
4. Remember! there's always somebody waiting outside to do the shit!
- You'll definitely come across smart asses in your 'work'place who is ready to shit and is just waiting for you to get out. He might even bang the door, pull the trigger, flush your accounts. So be on guard and no matter what happens, do your shit! or work. The best thing is, the one waiting outside is always inquisitive about your shit!
5. You might enjoy the calmness, the peace and aura surrounding it, and yet remember! you can't live in a restroom.
- HR policies of today's organizations make sure they throw a hell a load of sand into our eyes. They make the best offices with the latest architectural designs and entertainment features. A toilet built in the form of a Colosseum is still a large restroom!
6. Overeating will result in constipation and you'll suffer from a heavy load!
- Never show that you can do more work than what is required. It is funny but yes, people will take it for granted and you'll be loaded with work all the time. Never ever do it! You'll never be freed from shit! err.. work!
7. When you're in Rome, do as the Romans do! - Use toilet paper.
- It might be stinky, sticky, but since you decided to be in Rome, you need to go by their protocols. If you keep searching for newer ways to work, the last thing you'll get is a bouquet decorated with the best of the flowers and a small note appreciating all the efforts that went in vain!
8. One who is in the restroom for long goes unnoticed, but one who leaves within seconds is always noticed!
- It is but funny to describe this situation. A person who leaves late from office always goes unnoticed, while a person who leaves early immaterial of whether he completes his work or not is noticed as an efficient and a smart worker. So leave early!
9. One who farts while doing the 'thing' will definitely get noticed.
- A person who makes a lot of noise while working is definitely noticed. Except for a few of us who think of courtesy as a duty, everybody else is definitely noticed!
and finally,
10. Early to the restroom and early to finish makes one wealthy, wise and diplomatic! :)
Ok now... I gotta go, my boss's banging the door! ;)
Comments
:)
I've got one more.
No matter whichever position you reach, its the same shit as everyone.
So shed the same respect to the downlines as you would to your boss.
I need to go to the loo now ;)
Just to get an idea of how u matched all this ;)
he he he!!! good one! everybody's open to add more to the list!! :)
Ha ha ha! now you can understand the shit that i must have gone through!! Thank you and you're open to add more after you come out of the loo!! :)
Ooppsss sorry hitting the bulls eye
Ooppsss sorry hitting the bulls eye
he he he! I know!!! :P